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05 September 2010 @ 12:20 pm
fanmix #0001  

Title: Undisclosed Desires
Pairing: Dean/Ruby
Rating: NC-17 (slightly)
Summary: AU. Dean hates Ruby. But one night, she said something. Just one thing that changed everything.
Notes: This is my very first fanmix. I made it for a gift exchange at spnrarepairs. This was a gift for reality0junkie. I'm not a Dean/Ruby shipper at all but I had lots of fun creating this. So, who knows? I might create more fanmixes in the future *wink*

The story behind the fanmix:

"Ruby? Why do you want us to win?"
"Isn't it obvious? I'm not like them. I wish I was, but I'm not. I remember what it's like."
"What what's like?"
"Being human."

That's the night Dean and Ruby started seeing each other. He didn't even know why he went to her. It was supposed to be just one night thing. No feeling. Just sex. 
However they kept sleeping together. In secret. Sam had no idea. Especially since Dean was supposed to hate her. And he kept hating her at first. But things changed.
He realized he had to stop before it was to late. The path he was taking was is way too dangerous. She's a freaking demon.  
So he ended the relationship.

He then starts to dream about her. He remembers their nights together. He realizes she was right when she said she remembered what it's like to be human. She's more than a demon. There's definitely something more in her. Something beautiful. Plus he misses her. He wanna go back to her. He wanna show her what he sees in her. He wants to be with her. They're not supposed to be together. They are not destined to each other. Who cares about destiny anyway?

Notes: This is all about Dean. How he feels towards Ruby. The bonus song is from Ruby POV when Dean broke up with her. She was starting to feeling human again thanks to him. She felt things she haven't feel for a really long time. 



['i hate everything about you' - Three Days Grace]

Every time we lie awake
After every hit we take
Every feeling that I get
But I haven’t missed you yet
I hate everything about you
Why do I love you
I hate everything about you
Why do I love you

['resistance' - Muse]

Is your secret safe tonight?
And are we out of sight?
Or will our world come tumbling down?

Will they find our hiding place?
Is this our last embrace?
Or will the walls start caving in?
Love is our resistance
They keep us apart and they won't stop breaking us down
And hold me, our lips must always be sealed

If we live our life in fear
I'll wait a thousand years
Just to see you smile again

['i'm not in love' - 10cc]

I'm not in love, so don't forget it
It's just a silly phase I'm going through
And just because I call you up
Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made
I'm not in love, no-no
(It's because...)
I like to see you, but then again
That doesn't mean you mean that much to me
So if I call you, don't make a fuss

['careless whisper' - Seether]

I feel so unsure
as I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor
as the music dies, something in your eyes
calls to mind the silver screen
and all its sad good-byes

I'm never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool

['sleeping to dream' - Jason Mraz]

I'm dreaming of sleeping next to you
I'm feeling like a lost little boy in a brand new town.
I'm counting my sheep and each one that passes is another dream to ashes
and they all fall down.
And as I lay me down tonight,
I close my eyes, what a beautiful sight.
I'm so tired

['when the body speaks' - Depeche Mode]

To the soul's desires
The body listens
What the flesh requires
Keeps the heart imprisoned
I'm just a slave here
At the mercy
Of a girl
Oh I need your tenderness
Oh I need your touch
Oh I dream of one caress
Oh I pray too much

['sorry' - Buckcherry]

Oh I had a lot to say was thinking on my time away
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round

['undisclosed desires' - Muse]

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart,
I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask,
I want to exorcise the demons from your past,
I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

['bad romance' - 30 Seconds to Mars]

You and me could write a bad romance
I want your love, and all your love is revenge
You and me could write a bad romance


['almost lover' - A Fine Frenzy]

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to thing about you
Can't you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

Current Location: home
Current Mood: hungryhungry
Maria :)reality0junkie on October 15th, 2010 06:04 pm (UTC)
Hey I've only just seen this. I didn't have computer access for a couple months..
Anyways this is pretty awesome!! Fantastic cover and great song choices!